


In My Coffin Lies the Truth

by Della19



Series: Stop All The Clocks [3]
Category: Captain America (2011), Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Alternate Canon, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-16
Updated: 2012-07-16
Packaged: 2017-11-10 01:37:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/460792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Della19/pseuds/Della19
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s when Tony punches Steve in the face that Peggy realizes they’re going to have a talk-one that isn’t going to go well.  He buried her, mourned her while she was still alive, and she let him. He’s allowed to be angry about that.  Tony, Peggy and what comes after happily ever after-Part 3 in my Stop All the Clocks series. Steve/Peggy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In My Coffin Lies the Truth

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: We’ve been over this right? Not mine-Joss is God.

************************

 _“The truth is messy. It's raw and uncomfortable. You can't blame people for preferring lies.”_ ― Holly Black, _Red Glove_

************************

The problem starts when Tony cold-cocks Steve in the kitchen.

Ok, well, in the interest of fairness, not really.

The problem starts when Steve Rogers kisses Peggy Carter, mouth bleeding, and Peggy stops aging. The problem starts when Howard and Maria Stark make Peggy Tony’s godmother and Peggy loves Tony from the moment he’s born. The problem starts when Peggy tries to pick up the slack for Howard with Tony, and Tony bonds more with Peggy than he ever did with his father.

The problem starts when Tony Stark buries an empty coffin and Peggy lets him, hiding in plain sight as Sharon Carter, forcing him to mourn a woman not dead.

And then there’s a punch to Steve’s face.

But she’s getting ahead of herself.

************************

See, the thing no one ever tells you is what happens after happily ever after.  Coulson lives, and Peggy and Steve have their moment-finally-but then what?

Because it’s great that Peggy and Steve have found each other, really it is, and Peggy couldn’t be happier, but Peggy Carter has been legally dead for years, and Sharon Carter has a clearance level that would make God weep bitter, bitter tears of envy in an organization that doesn’t take lightly to keeping this kind of a thing a secret.

Peggy’s been living a lie for so long, and now with Steve, she wants to live the truth.

It’s getting there that’s going to suck.

Fairy-tale’s never seem to mention all the work the legal department is going to have to do.

But’s that’s after they talk to Fury.

************************

Peggy’s conversation with Nick Fury goes something like this.

_I’m not Sharon Carter, I’m actually Margaret Carter. I haven’t aged since the war._

_Ok. Anything else?_

And this doesn’t really surprise Peggy, because she and Fury think in similar ways, and despite what Steve and the team think, he’s not a bad guy. The Howling Commandos wouldn’t have followed him after Steve’s death if he had been, and Fury, contradictory to his name-and his eye patch, but that can’t be helped-is actually a pretty rational-within reason, because nobody entirely sane dreams up something like the Avengers Initiative-guy. 

However Steve doesn’t know Fury as well as she does, because this is where the conversation would have ended, if not for Steve’s incredulous, “That’s it?” And then, because he’s still Steve, “Sir.”

Fury spares him a look that’s dryness doesn’t suffer a bit from missing one eye before he says, voice almost bored, “We had a contingency in place if she turned out to actually be Margaret Carter.”

And then at Steve’s look, a marriage of shock and moral outrage-because that’s just the kind of man he is-Fury continues, tone still slightly disinterested, “Don’t look so surprised-we also had a contingency in place if she turned out to be a skrull, or a clone, or a robot or a product of spatial genetic multiplicity. I think the only contingency plan we didn’t have was if you were actually Sharon Carter and it was just good genetics.”

Steve’s eyes are making a decent attempt at escaping from his skull, but Peggy only smiles as she parries back, “You stole that last part from Doctor Who.”

“Doctor Who stole it from me,” Fury says, and even Peggy can’t tell if he’s bullshiting or not, before he sobers, voice his typical no nonsense drawl, “Does being Peggy instead of Sharon change the type of agent you’ll be?”

“No sir,” she says simply, and it’s the truth. She’s always been her, no matter what she name answers to-now she’s just going to be a happier person.

“Excellent,” Fury says, and then, both truthful and wry, “Your clearance level was too high for us to fire you anyways.”

And then his voice takes on a bit more of his menacing air, though not enough to truly bite, “Now get out, because I’ve got more important things to do then watch you two make cow eyes at each other.”

Peggy throws him a small smile over her shoulder as she drags a still stunned Steve out the door.

Fury smiles back.

Peggy knows it’s only going to go downhill from here.

************************

Steve is ecstatic after they visit Fury, but Steve also thought telling Fury would be the hardest part.

Peggy knows it wasn’t.

Peggy knows that Tony is going to be the worst.

Because Tony, who loved her like a parent, buried an empty coffin, and Peggy saw the devastation on his face at her funeral.

Tony mourned her with everything he was, and she let him, when in reality she was alive.

Tony Stark had three parents.

They all let him down.

Peggy isn’t looking forward to this.

************************

Fate is apparently smiling on Peggy for once, because Tony turns out to be in China for business, and not expected back for a few days. She knows it’s a bit cowardly to take such relief in that, but Peggy thinks it’s justified.  Tony might appear shallow and self-absorbed, but this is just a facade-in reality Tony feels so much deeper than other people that it’s the only way for him to cope.

Well, that and a hot-rod red armoured suit that fires rockets.

Still, Peggy isn’t actually planning to stay in Stark-or possibly the Avengers Tower, a name change that Tony is fighting against half-heartily-until he comes back. It seems a bit like tempting fate, and to be honest, Peggy already knows most of the members of the Avengers. She and Hawkeye and Widow have worked missions together, she’s Tony’s godmother, and she’s in love with Steve.  The only two members she doesn’t know are Thor and Doctor Banner, and neither of them are actually staying in the Tower presently-Thor back in Asgard and Doctor Banner taking some time in Nepal-though Peggy imagines that Tony will wear him down eventually. 

But, the point still stands-Peggy wasn’t planning on staying in Stark Tower.

And then Steve, a bashful expression on his face, shuffles his feet adorably at the door to his suite in the Tower and asks, voice so shy and so _Steve_ that Peggy’s heart almost hurts with love, “Do you want to come in…for coffee, or something?”

And Peggy, whose been waiting for this for seven decades, decides to damn fate-reels him in by his collar, closes the door, and fixes her lips to his-rejoices as his hands, after a moment of hesitation, come up to brush the curves of her hips, and then slowly creep higher to other curves.

They do not drink coffee.

Neither of them mind.

************************

Needless to say, Peggy’s plan not to stay in the Tower gets a little of track, but really, it’s not her fault.  Saint’s themselves couldn’t resist a naked Steven Rogers spread out below them, even if they hadn’t been waiting 70 years.

And Peggy’s certainly no Saint.

And while she’s on that subject- _absolutely_ worth the wait.  Because it could have been really awkward-70 years of expectations are hard to live up to, and Steve’s inexperience doesn’t help with that-although, as a side note; the fact that she gets to not only be the first, but perhaps the _only_ person who gets to watch him fall apart like that; so unbelievably arousing-it really, really wasn’t.  And really, though it’s a crass thought, Peggy finds herself wanting to put more flowers on Erskine’s grave because she owes him a truckload of thanks, because that super soldier serum stamina is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

Forget the battlefield advantages; the bedroom is where the real profit margins are.

Peggy doesn’t intend to share though, so it’s really a moot point.

So, it’s understandable that Peggy loses track of time a bit, with such…delectable things taking up her attention.

Running into Tony Stark in his own kitchen, wearing only a bandana and one of Steve’s button down shirts brings her back down to earth pretty quickly though.

“Sharon?” Tony asks as he stops, squints at her face for a moment, telling brown hair hidden under her bandana, and Peggy’s heart beats a staccato rhythm in her chest, “Sharon Carter?”

“Tony…” she starts, stalling for just a moment more as she goes over her mental calendar, “you weren’t supposed to be back from China until tomorrow.”

“I got in early,” Tony says, waving that information away with a dismissive hand gesture in favor of something juicier as he asks, genuinely confused for a second, because she’s the niece of this third parent and an asexual figure, “What are you doing here, in my kitchen, in a man’s dress shirt?”

And then, a knowing leer settles over his face as he gets it, and he asks, suggestively but good-naturedly, “Who’d you score with, Bruce, Clint?” And Peggy can’t help but blink, because she-a spy-was so absorbed in Steve that she didn’t even notice that Doctor Banner-the actual _Hulk_ -was back in the Tower before she’s caught up in listening to Tony who continues, “Please tell it’s not Coulson, because I could take Bruce or Clint while defending your virtue, but Coulson’s a ninja and mean with that Taser.”

“No, I" She says, brain momentarily stalling at the absurdity of that before it reloads, “there’s something we should-“

And of course, because life is a cruel, cruel thing, it’s at that exact moment that Steve comes up the hallway, voice carrying as he says, “Peggy where are-“ and then he notices Tony, and changes direction, not knowing that the damage he’s just caused, “Tony, I didn’t know you were back already. Everything go well?”

And for Peggy, there’s this moment where everything just sort of slows and time moves sluggishly-the look that Tony sends her, and then at her own frozen look, the expression on Tony’s that blooms, somewhere between anger, outrage and disappointment-all painfully clear.

And then Tony punches Steve in the face, and time snaps back pretty quickly.

“Tony what-“ Steve starts, genuinely confused, because in their…distraction, Peggy hadn’t gotten around to explaining to him the whole situation with Tony to him, and so Steve doesn’t understand Tony’s anger, although even Peggy is a little mystified at why Tony is angry at _Steve_.

That becomes quite clear as Tony continues, rounding on Steve as he says, voice tightly leashed with a protective anger, “You should be ashamed of yourself, using a girl like that, as a substitute, and then calling her by the wrong name! I’m no paragon of virtue but even I don’t treat girls like that, and I won’t stand for you doing it to Sharon.” And then a hint of disappointment creeps into his tone as he says severely, too quick for Peggy to jump in and correct his misconception, “I thought better of you Cap, but I guess I was wrong.”

“No, I-” Steve starts, look of horror on his face at the thought of actually doing something like that, but Peggy cuts him off, because this is her problem, and although she really doesn’t want to do this, she’s the only one that can clear this up.  

“Tony, no-Look” she starts, and then realizing that words aren’t going to cut it, she picks up one of the knives from the counter and draws it across her arm as she did so many years ago with Howard, and just like Howard, Tony and Steve’s protesting noises drop off as the skin heals back up right before their eyes.  She then waits until Tony’s stunned eyes have met her own again before she says, voice soothing to try and diffuse some of the shock, “It’s me Tony-Peggy. The serum made me stop aging-I didn’t die.”

And Peggy, who’s spent all of Tony’s life reading his facial expressions, knows exactly what the one that blooms over his face is.

Betrayal.

And this, _this_ was the moment that Peggy was dreading.

Because his face is a mask of betrayal and hurt, and Peggy’s heart bleeds, because this is her doing, and she never wanted to hurt Tony this way.  But this is Tony, and so the expression disappears almost as quickly as it appeared as he schools his face into his media façade-that phony smile that only makes Peggy’s heart hurt even more.

 “Ah, well, that’s just…great!” Tony says, aiming for cheerful nonchalance, but he fails miserably, so much so that even Steve, who doesn’t know him like she does clearly picks it up, and Peggy can’t help but step forward, her voice apologetic and pleading, “Tony…”

“No really, it’s fantastic!” Tony says, cutting her off, but his smile is far too frayed and his voice has left the realm of falsely cheerful and is straddling the line of hysterics as he says, “ I’m just-“ and then he cuts off, and in an abrupt movement, turns and leaves the room without any further explanation, leaving a weighted silence behind.

“I’m so sorry…” Steve starts, trailing off as he moves to take her in her arms, and Peggy curls into them, taking comfort from the warm, reassuring strength of him.  She stays that way for a moment, the soothing movement of his chest moving as he breathes a balm for her raw feelings, before she finally draws up the courage to do what’s necessary as she pulls back slightly and says, “It’s not your fault-this one is one me.  And it should be me that goes after him-you stay here.”

Steve seems reluctant to do that, his chivalrous instincts that Peggy so loves kicking in at full strength, but he acquiesces after a moment, giving her a quick, sweet kiss to her forehead as he says, “I’ll be in the gym if you need me.  Good luck.”

“Thank you,” Peggy says, meaning it, because his support is so very precious to her, and then after a few fortifying breathes, Peggy sets off to have that discussion she was dreading so.

Peggy doesn’t know the Tower all that well-she spent the majority of her time in Steve’s rooms, but Peggy does know the inhabitants of the Tower, and she knows their routines.  Hawkeye has the roof and Widow the dance studio for their anger, but Peggy knows where she’ll find Tony.

Sure enough when Peggy arrives at Tony’s workshop-after a quick detour for some ice and a pair of pants, because this is one of those conversations that demands pants-she can see Tony through the glass of the front wall, tinkering angrily away at some machine.  The door is locked, but JARVIS unlocks it for her before she can even ask-JARVIS has always liked her, in so much as an AI can like anyone; thinks she’s good for Tony-and so his unvoiced support is especially important here.

And so, that in mind, Peggy takes a breath, and enters the belly of the beast.

Tony looks up at the ceiling as she enters, ignoring her in favor of glaring silently at JARVIS-not that JARVIS is in the ceiling, but it’s the principle of the thing-and Peggy takes another fortifying breath, lets him stew for moment before taking a seat near him on an empty space on the work-bench.  After a moment-where Tony is still ignoring her, but not with purpose anymore-Peggy breaks the silence, sliding the ice in front of his eye line and saying quietly, “Ice-for your hand. Steve’s chin is like granite-and that it’s sculpted like a marble statue doesn’t help either.”

Tony doesn’t smile at that as she might have hoped, but he does take the ice and press it to his hand, and finally meets her eyes, giving her a nod of thanks in acknowledgement.  There’s another moment of silence then, where Tony ices his hand and Peggy lets him think and gathers her own nerve.  After she thinks enough time has passed she bites the bullet and breaks the silence, saying to the general room at large, “Your father always used to hide away in his workshop when he was angry as well,” she and says it gently, because for all that she knows that Howard is a touchy subject with Tony, it’s going to come up eventually, and she might as well just jump in with both feet.

Sure enough Tony reacts just the way she expected, responding with not an insignificant amount of bitterness, “Then he must have been angrier than the Hulk, because he was always too busy to spend time with me.”

“He loved you so much Tony, but he did make many mistakes,” she says, not willing to minimize Tony’s pain, because Howard saved her life so many times over, but he had his faults just like anyone else. “He was a good man, but he was also an obsessive workaholic that lost track of what day it was when he was in the thrall of some new idea.”

“Of course,” she says, voice wry but kind, “we know no one else like that.”

Tony sends her a look at that, but’s it’s a look of acknowledgment and wryly agreement, not one of anger, and Peggy takes that as a good sign as she continues, getting to the meat of it, voice displaying nothing but truth, “You’re your own person Tony, and I’ve always loved you for you, not for Howard. But if you had to be like someone, I just want you to know that you could have done worse than Howard.”

Tony nods at that, seemingly taking it in stride, and Peggy can almost see the cogs of that fantastic brain of his chug along as he asks, “He was the one that set the whole ‘Sharon’ thing for you, wasn’t he?”

“Yes-he knew if something didn’t happen I’d end up a lab rat somewhere,” Peggy answers, and even now, in the fallout of that decision Peggy can’t help but be grateful for it, because the alternative is still unthinkable.

Tony nods again, acknowledging _that_ , before he says, voice just this side of too casual, “So you trusted him to do that for you.”

“We went through a lot together,” Peggy says, one of the greatest understatements of her life, because Howard was the friend she went to when her world ended, and he was the one that kept her together, “I trusted him with my life.”

“Then why could you have trusted me?” Tony demands, voice hurt, and Peggy realizes they’ve hit the heart of the issue here as he continues, “You practically raised me!”

“Tony…” she starts gently, taking a second to compose her thoughts into a way that he’ll understand before she continues, trying to put all of her feelings for Tony-for this whole situation-into her voice, “I’ve loved you since the moment you were born. But it wasn’t about trusting you; it was about protecting myself from people who would take advantage of what I was. And you weren’t in a good enough place to do that then, and you know that,” she says, and he nods ruefully in understanding before she says, voice lighter, “It’s why I had to find Pepper for you.”

“You’re being far too understanding,” Tony says after a moment, voice mock serious this time, and he wags a finger at her, but there’s no intent behind it, “it’s making it very hard for me to stay mad at you.”

“You buried me Tony, and you mourned me, and all the while I was alive. You’re allowed to be angry at me about that,” she says, because it’s the truth, and if the shoe was on the other foot she’d be furious. “But I’m your family, and I’ll still be here for you, no matter what,” she finishes, and means it, because Tony is important to her, like Steve is, and she refuses to lose him.

And so at that, Peggy sits back and resolves that whatever he decides, she’ll accept it. If he’s angry, she’ll bear it-if he wants her to stay away then she’ll give him his space, as much as everything she is screams against the idea.

But Tony surprises her, just by being Tony, and does none of those things.

Instead he enfolds her into his arms, buries his head into her neck like he used to when he was a child, and just holds on.

Peggy clings back.

The position isn’t as comfortable as it was when he was young-the angle is off, and her tears are getting in his hair, and her neck is suspiciously wet-but Peggy wouldn’t let go for anything.

He’s family.

“If anyone ever asks, I reserve the right to tell them that I stayed stoic and manly through this whole process, and that any crying rumors are a vicious, vicious lie,” Tony says after a moment, voice somehow clear even though it’s projected into her neck, and Peggy can’t help but let out a wet laugh, entirely born of relief, because she knows Tony, and this is a good sign.

“Your secret is safe with me,” she says as he draws back, and she can’t help but ruffle a hand through his hair like she used to years ago, before she quips, to lighten the mood, “JARVIS however I can’t speak for.”

“If this video ever gets out I will program you to sound like a hillbilly, I swear!” Tony says to JARVIS in response, who answers after a second, “Of course sir,” his synthetic voice displaying an edge of gentle insolence, “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

After that, there is another moment of silence, but comfortable this time as, after one final squeeze to her hand, Tony moves away, returning back to his work-bench, and Peggy thinks that’s going to be the end of this discussion.

But then, something catches Tony’s memory, as he says, voice confused, “Wait, what do you mean you found Pepper for me?”

But then, before Peggy can say anything Tony’s brain catches up and he says, voice somewhere between impressed and disbelieving, “You were totally the one who made that error in my math weren’t you?!” And then, with a level of genuine satisfaction that only Tony can achieve, “I knew that wasn’t my mistake-Rhodey owes me money!”

Peggy’s laughter echoes throughout the whole floor.

They’re going to be alright.

Because Tony is ok, and somewhere in a gym in this building Steve is waiting for her, and if this is what comes after happily ever after, Peggy’s looking forward to it.

There are worse ways a girl could spend forever.

************************

FIN

************************

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Yeah so this happened. My Tony feels went into overdrive a bit-I really love Tony, because I think he’s kind of a still waters running deep kind of guy, which opens up so many fun possibilities. I don’t think this is the end of this universe yet-I have Peggy/Steve smut in mind! Because I have too, ok! 70 years and super serum is just too much to pass up! That said, enjoy, and reviews and constructive criticism are welcome.


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